How childhood trauma manifests in adulthood.
It’s gone, why are you overacting so much? True but still has left many marks on present me.
As a person who has experienced adverse childhood experiences, I try to be normal but many times have failed to do so. Whenever I try to feel confident, something in my head pulls me downwards. Whenever I made a mistake, this negative voice made me feel like I was born stupid and that everyone was smarter than me. And still, these voices come to me and say all these things to me. It’s me who tries not to take these voices too seriously. And it just doesn’t stop there, I have uncontrolled anger meaning whenever I get angry, I become destructive and I feel afraid of it.
When you have a parent too much of a perfectionist or mean to you, who overly criticizes you for your small mistakes, the belief of you being stupid will be internalized and you will miss many opportunities because you are not smart enough. If you have managed not just to survive but thrive amid all the negative noises, you are a champion, my dear. You need to know that you are smart on your own. If you didn’t get the right people in childhood to tell you that, it doesn’t mean you are not. And don’t overthink about small things, those are not as important as you were taught. Whatever gone is gone, you can’t control what happened but you can direct what is happening and what’s going to happen.
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